When Your Notifications Become Someone's Worst Nightmare

16 messages? 1+ unanswered calls... 6.157 emails? Basically don't expect a reply from this person ever....

18,000 odd emails?!! And also there's spare space on this front page, but there's 2 more pages for apps? Oh that's not good...

2 different mail apps and you still have over 13,000 unread emails?! Also that settings update is THE WORST. UPDATE YOUR SOFTWARE MUM! What's a stable diary? Horse stuff? DON'T IGNORE HORSE STUFF RED BUBBLES!

Another dual mail app user with over 13,000 unread emails... What's Unicorn Rush? obviously not a Mail related app, it doesn't have a red bubble with a huge number in it....

23 apps need updating! UPDATE THEM! AAAAARGH! Also what are those 40 for?? Tumblr notifications? READ YOUR TUMBLR! 3000+ unread emails doesn't even seem to bother me anymore.... Am I becoming immune to this AWFUL activity???

I assume from the background image that this person has a child, but THEY ALSO HAVE AN EMAIL ADDRESS AND ONE IS BEING NEGLECTED! NEGLECTED!!

"Look Mum, you have 47,000 unread emails... you're an awful person"

20,000???!!! Y U DO DIS?

The apps that need updating are a REAL issue here people. Respect the app. UPDATE THE APP! Also you seem to have a few unread emails....

50 APPS NEED UPDATING! I DON'T EVEN HAVE THAT MANY APPS ON MY PHONE. ALSO YOU HAVE 5 PAGES OF APPS. MAKE A FOLDER. READ YOUR EMAILS. UPDATE YOUR SETTINGS. AND YOU HAVE A PENDING NOTIFICATION IN YOUR HEALTH FOLDER... IT'S PROBABLY MY DOCTOR TELLING YOU THAT YOU ARE KILLING ME HERE.

123 UNANSWERED CALLS? WHY DO YOU EVEN HAVE A PHONE. JUST CARRY AROUND AN IPAD IF YOU HAD PHONE CALLS THAT MUCH. Also you have nearly 20,000 unread emails... I don't know if you know that... but that's what that red bubble with 19,965 in it means YOU MONSTER!

If you have more unread emails in your Inbox than your junk folder we can't be friends and you don't deserve the modern convenience of email. If you never cleared your mailbox back in the day the postie would have take it away from you. Look after your things... 

16 unread Yahoo mail messages isn't the worst thing I've ever seeee.... WAIT... 30,000 UNREAD GMAIL MESSAGES? I WILL FIGHT YOU. I WILL FIGHT YOU GOOD.

50,000?????!!!!! I HAVEN'T EVEN RECEIVED THAT MANY EMAILS IN MY LIFE!

HOW LAZY ARE YOU? I mean I'm VERY LAZY, but even I take the time to read text messages... YOUR NANA MIGHT BE DEAD. THEY MIGHT BE ALERTING YOU VIA TEXT.

55 updates? 1,224 unread emails, 15 unanswered social notifications?! You better be dead or in a coma... Those are the only excuses I'm accepting!

16,000?! I am getting stomach ulcers making this gallery... also you have only 3 favourite apps down the bottom and gaps on your first page but 2 more pages of apps?!! Please.... let me help you...

WHAT DOES THE EMPTY RED DOT ON YOUR PHONE CALLS EVEN MEAN?! Also if you have time to use an app to gamble, you have time to read some of those 26,000 emails...

Would you please just delete that dropbox app??? PUHLEEEASE? Also why have Viber if you're not going to answer it/reply to messages... 

At this stage of the gallery I either have a headache or a brain tumour... I blame every one of you..

I think some people just want to watch the world burn...

You really need to sort out every aspect of your life... You have a folder called "FOLDER", you have a bunch of apps that need updating, your email is out of control... Snaps, texts & kiks are unread... BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY YOU HAVE 10 PEOPLE ON TINDER INTERESTED IN YOU AND YOU HAVEN'T EVEN BEEN POLITE ENOUGH TO LOOK AT THEIR PROFILES. But if they saw this I doubt they'd even be interested haha.

You're getting in some dangerous territory now... You're almost the email version of the TV show Hoarders...

PUT THE REST IN THE TRASH TOO!

I'm not angry, I'm disappointed AND angry...

JUST REMOVE THE MAIL APP FROM YOUR GOSH DARNED DOCK!

Looking at your actual mail messages I see your problem... You've not unsubscribed from anything... ever...

Good order on the main part of the screen. Good background... but... DEM MESSAGES! also what's connect? that doesn't seem like a FAV 4 app choice...

SELECT ALL. DELETE ALL. DONE. There. I fixed your life.

52,000??!! That's more stars than are in the night sky on your phone wallpaper. You have a problem.

1. SO MUCH MAIL.

2. WHO HAS STOCKS ON THEIR FRONT PAGE?!

Is your phone on silent because of the constant alerts you get for not reading any mail?! 

What would your Mother say?

You can't hide mail in a folder and expect us not to see your dirty little secret shame... Those red bubble will haunt you forever... And that's what you deserve.

This folder should be renamed "My life is a shambles"

588 unread texts? I just dont get it. How do you not read that many texts? Who are you ignoring??!! Also the collective unanswered calls & 11 emails is probably why you have 17 LinkedIn messages from people saying "You don't deserve a job"

Bad Wifi. Low Battery. Unread mail. Apps. gaps with extra pages. We can't be friends.

Here's an idea, listen to those 3 unheard podcasts and while you're doing that, DELETE ALL THOSE EMAILS!

You're not traveling anywhere until those utilities are under control & that mail situation is sorted...

I'm on my way to your house to confiscate your computer. You don't deserve nice things.

I'm contacting your bank (ANZ I'm guessing) and freezing your accounts until you sort that mail out...

No. No. No.

Use your phone app to call yourself back in 2001 and say "don't bother getting an email address, you'll never use it"

HOW DO YOU JUST LEAVE THAT SITTING THERE??!!

When you get to this point you might as well just try for 100,000... you're too far gone to help...

Open EVERNOTE and add a note to sort yourself out ASAP. 66 app updates? How do you function?

Please just delete at least one of those apps...

Is that wallpaper a black hole? are you hoping it's just going to swallow up that email situation? Because you're being silly... But silly is obviously your thing...

You have more unread texts than emails... I can't get my head around this... Do you hate humanity??

Having your apps spaced out on an iPad doesn't make those notifications any less irritating...

Have you recently lost your fingers in a fruit ninja accident? Because that's the only reasonable explanation I can see for this sort of witchery...

Add "sort my shit out" to your countdown app...

52000??? I think I'm giving up on humans...

Your dog has died on unread mail poisoning, you're a bad person...

Here's an idea for a game you can play in Game Centre... "Clean up your mail"

YOU HAVE AN ERRANDS APP! YOU SHOULD BE ALL OVER THIS!

Okay, you have a folder called Folder and it doesn't seem to have any sort of theme to it and it's full of unread mail... I can only assume you're a lizard with an iphone...

what are those 43 reminders?! You have 43 things to be actively reminded of? It better be

1. clear mail.

2. answer messages. 

3. Update apps...

4. Repeat until finished... 

I appreciate that you only have one line of apps so you can appreciate your lovely wallpaper... But seriously... Can't we please sort ourselves out?!

I don't even have 522 messages on my phone and you have that many unread? I hope your phone dies and you lose it all. That might seem harsh, but you deserve it. You're a monster.

half. a. million. unread. mail. messages.

I just... I can't... It's... 

I felt we needed to end this gallery with this ZEN photo of someone who has sorted their apps by colour. It's nice. It's different. No notification bubbles... I think I feel my chi balancing again... Breath in Vaughan, breath out.... Phew... Now I need a hard drink...